When people meet me, the first thing they assume, because I have breasts, is that I am a woman. Even after I tell them that I am a man, I continue to have to remind them that I am a man, just because I don’t have a flat chest (Apparently the rest of my female appearing body doesn’t count). I am currently unable to afford a binder to flatten these, and I refuse to use ace bandages or other damaging ways to hide my breasts.
Please, if you meet someone, don’t assume their gender just because of their body. You don’t know if they are transitioning, or are trans, or are cis. You don’t know if they are fighting a daily battle between their mind and their body, wanting to physically mutilate themselves to try to get their body to match up with their mind. Instead of assuming, if you don’t know what gender/sex to refer to the person by, just use their name! As Obi Wan Kenobi said many years ago, “Your eyes can deceive you, don’t trust them.”
My breasts do not define who I am. I AM A MAN!
I have had a few questions on what I am trying to say in the post, so here goes.
The main points of the post are to remind people that society has placed upon us what we should “expect” people to be based on appearances and not on who they are. We are raised to associate a person’s gender with their physical sex, and if they don’t match then it is not our issue, they should just have to deal with it and keep quiet because they are the minority. It is only once they are able to “pass” as the sex that matches their gender that we as a society start to even really bother to recognize the person as their actual gender, and even then it is hit or miss for people (see the examples of Caitlyn Jenner, Fallon Fox, and Caroline “Tula” Cossey for how people refuse to accept the person’s gender).
The post and the image is trying to bring attention to the fact that we as people are not defined by our physical parts. Not every person with a penis is a man, nor is every person with breasts a woman, yet we are trained in this society to match the two. I am trying with this post to call attention to this issue and that people need to remember that we are not just male/female in this world. There are many societies and cultures around the world that have for centuries recognized multiple genders beyond the two that we in western society view as “normal” (man/woman male/female) and they do not define these people by their physical bodies.
Our society needs to stop putting so much emphasis on the physical and start treating the person as the individual they are, and we should not be assuming right off the bat who or what they are just because of how they look. I’m not saying we should walk up to people and go, “What are your pronouns?” or things like that, but that we should not assume to know their gender just because of their physical sex.
I am also trying to make the point that when a person has told you their gender, to ignore it and continue to base how you refer to the person on their physical looks, it is not only rude but can be very damaging to that person.